Wahh-mulance.

We're back! I can't lie, I am excited. It was a long weekend...with LOTS of rain/hail/snow (in some bay area places) and power-outs. And it's HELLA raining right now. Glad I didn't slip while running the 10 feet from my car to the door. Phew. That would be embarrassing wouldn't it?

Today's Intern: Sarah

Wait, What chu say?: Gooooood Morning! "It's hella raining bluhhhd." - Menace. Menace got a new iPhone. There were a million emails about Menace, it turned into a make a wish foundation for Menace. Menace got Starbucks this weekend and was bitching about how hot it was. "It's boiling hot water, in a cup, does it need to be that EFFING hot!?" Funny thing was, his priority in this particular situation was to email Woody to share his horrible experiance. Next time Menace gets food, they will cut it and blow on it for him. I guess to put this blog in its correct format I should separate the email from the body of the blog, so here we go.

Emails from the Peoples:

Menace: I went to Starbucks and got a passion fruit tea (manly in itself), and it was wreally wreally hot.....and it burned me! Wahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.

Much better.... anyways. Greg finally got his TV and we discovered how technically retarded Greg is. He doesn't know if he has HD on his cable box. He doesn't know what the imput cables are. He can't figure out the song. He peeled off the sticker and it left a sticky mark on the front of it. We're off to a bad start with this whole TV thing.

News with Greg:

> Iraq journalist threw his shoes at Bush. In the middle of the news conference with Mr Maliki, Iraqi television journalist Muntadar al-Zaidi stood up and shouted "this is a goodbye kiss from the Iraqi people, dog," before hurling a shoe at Mr Bush which narrowly missed him. Watch the Video Here.

> New York Democrat said Monday that Caroline Kennedy has begun making calls to New York officials to officially express her interest in replacing Hillary Clinton in the United States Senate.

> Governor Patterson is not too happy about a bit on SNL that shows him kind of babbling around and having trouble. Because he is blind he was very offended, problem is, he said, "I got a chance to see it...." Did ya? Watch it Here

Ravey has our Sports:

> After teasing us last week, the arena football league cancelled its 2009 season.

> Sharks beat LA in a shoot out this weekend.

> Redwings lost last night to Colorado

> Eagles beat the Browns

> Warriors lost to the Magic last night.

> Tiger Woods' caddy shot his mouth off this weekend.

Stupid Human Story: A woman in Indiana was arrested after she lit up a joint in front of an officer. The woman was in the passenger seat of a car that had been pulled over for a traffic violation. While the cop was talking to the driver, the woman asked if she could smoke. He said yes, and she lit up a cigarrette which turned out to be a weed cigarrette, she was arrested on the spot. Effing idiot.

Music and Entertainment Report with Ravels:

> Fall Out Boy's latest album is out today, it was supposed to be out on Election day but they didn't want to take from Obama's win.

> Mama Mia is out today

> Mummy is also out today

> There will be a Guitar Hero Metallica released in 2009 and it will include 28 Metallica songs

> Pearl Jam will be made availiable for Rock Band

> Kevin Cogil was arrested for leaking Guns N' Roses songs. He pleaded guilty

> Jack Black will guest star in the post SuperBowl episode of the Office

> Will Smith has finalized sequels to 2 of his recent movies Hancock and I am Legend

> Tonight is the season finalle of Biggest Loser

Final Word: Axel Rose was answering online questions from fans. The question was, "Why he didnt release Chinese Democracy as a solo album?", "This is who i am , i dont see myself as only guns, but I do see myself as the only one from the past who is trying to take us forward"

Ask The Woody Show: From Julie: Is meeting up with an ex behind your new boyfriend's back considered cheating?? She asked him, and he said no, but she still wants to do it because it's just a harmless lunch.... Yeah OK.

What We Think: It's a mix up here in the station. Woody considers this cheating. The rest of us just think that it is lying. It will lead to nothing beneficial for your relationship. Anything that you can't do honestly in front of your boyfriend isn't a good idea. There is no such thing as a harmless lunch with an ex. Meance says Shut up Slut. Majority Rules from The Woody Show: All 6 of us say Bad Idea!!!!

Christmas Stories:

> A 4 year old triggered the silent alarm on the store across the street from his house. The child got out of his house and walked across the street and tried to get into the store. He couldn't get in through the front but he managed to trigger the back silent alarm.

> An elf working for a mall was going a story for AOL news and said a woman was waiting in line for about an hour for santa. The woman was being such a nut case about getting a good picture. Problem was, the kid was afraid of Santa, and woudln't smile. The woman went crazy, started cursing at the Santa, then took the kid outside and got "rough" with him.

> Farmers who rent animals for nativity scenes say that business is steady. There is only one issue and that is that camels are a little expensive and people are choosing cheaper livestock to replace them.

> A woman in Maryland is being charged with theft after swiping her neighbors Christmas decorations and using them as her own.

Comic Craig Gass is in the House!
He will be at Slims on Dec. 20 at 7:30 and 10:00 pm

Show is 18 and older only!

Want Tickets?? Get them HERE

or call Slims at 415.255.0333

Dumbass Contest: Impossible Holiday Trivia

How many Christmas gifts did my true love give to me in the 12 days of Christmas?

#1. Chris in SF - 78 Winner!

We do understand that the answer was in fact 364, sorry ladies and gents, "it is what it is"

Pointless Poll: Who do you think is sexy but NO ONE else does??

Ravey: Philip Seymour

Menace: Ugly Betty Chick - America Ferrera

Greg: Ellen Degeneres

Tony: Bridget Nielson

Woody: Tina Fey

Craig Gass: Queen Latifah

Katie: Mark Hoppus

News Round 2:

> The Obama cabinet is reppin the bay! Obama chose Steven Chu to be his energy chief.

> A man in Nutley, NJ is trying to pay off a $56 parking ticket. He is trying to pay it off in pennies and he is now being told that he can't pay it. They then said that he would have to put his name and licence number on each roll. He asked if he would have to put that info on each bill if he paid in $1 bills. They had no response and they put a warrant out for his arrest.... saying he didn't pay it, and also means that he had to pay an extra $90 to get out of jail. WTF?

Psycho Chick: Some chick named Sondra went to the Giants game wearing a Santa outfit, fishnet stockings, a skirt, a swimsuit bottom, and high heels. She was holding 2 signs. "Go Giants" and "Have a Gun Free Christmas"...The security then escorted her because she was dressed innapropriately and there were children present. She said she got kicked out because "other women just got jealous and complained."

What We Learned:

Ravey: Global warming is a myth because its snowing in Berkeley

Menace: Greg is legally insane

Greg: There is a diff between a cable box and an HD cable box

Tony: A Dave Chappel story is just Craig repeating his stand up bit.

Woody: Despite our friendships no one on this show will ever have to fight over a woman.

Katie: The next time I order a salad and there is lettuce in it, I am so emailing Woody.

Tony's Just a Headline: "Ass Man Retained As County Engineer"