Today's Intern: Mike
10,000 feet highhhhh: Goooooooood Morning! Belmont wants to ban the sales of hard alcohol. F you Belmont!!!! That is very San Francisco of them. Gavin Newsom is hella jealous, "I wanna ban something!" Menace hates water, because it doesn't taste like anything. Itzhak Valansky is a new star thanks to the show. As of yesterday, his music video had 210 views. As of 6:03 am there were 4,654 views. Hells Yes! Some people were dead to real.
Comments on "My Parachute Won't Open"
#1. zubin27 (7 hours ago)
you guys are obviously a bunch of mooks. The philosophical issues itzhak brings up in this song are beyond what you're plebeian minds can grasp. The song is about love, and how that person can fuck you over, hard. In this case, his parachute won't open and "you were the one who packed my bags." He then goes on to say "breaking up is hard to do, and actions speak louder than words." She was being creative....this song is the new millenia's version of "im only sleeping" by the beatles. kudos
#2. rxbanditboy1112 (10 hours ago) So from 10,000 feet to 8,000 feet he traveled 75.75 miles per hour, then from 8,000 to 4,000 he is traveling 48.701 mph, then from 4000 to 3000 it is 333.333333 mph (same with 3000 to 2000). Then all of a sudden from 2000 to 1000 he slows down to 167.6667 and then from 1000 to 0 it ends at 142.857 mph. Terminal velocity is 120mph. So despite the laws of fix this song is awesome or something.
Yesterday we learned that the general tickets are sold out for NSSN 2008. They then released some limited view tickets. We will also be giving away some tickets next week. So the doctors can't figure out how to cure herpes, cancer, or even the common cold, BUT they can go into your DNA and tell you what sports you can play.
News with Mr. Greg:
> The state appeals court over ruled Arnold Schwarzenegger about the parole of a man who bruttally killed his wife with a sledgehammer back in 1986. He was recovering from alcoholism and she was parading him for being sexually inadequate.
> A 19 year old girl was arrested, cuffed, and put her in the back of a cop car. She managed to get the cuffs around her body and she STOLE the cop car. What a kickass chick.
> On day 2 of hunting season, a guy shot a deer, thought it was dead, but to his surprise the deer jumped up and attacked the hunter with its antlers. HELLS YES GO DEER!!
Ravey has some Sports for us:
> Plaxeco Burress is done for the year. The attention has been put off to Pierce (the linebacker) who called the trainer right after Plaxeco shot himseslf. He hasn't faced any charges just yet.
> Kevin and Pat Willams have recieved a restraining order on their suspention. There is a chance that they will play this weekend.
> The doctor who treated Burress is also suspended for not reporting the shooting.
> Blue Jackets are up agains the Sharks at the Tank tonight.
Stupid Human Story: This on is from Arkansas: Police said they arrested a man who needed an extra boost with his coffee. This man pulled up next to an unmarked cop car. He then snorted a white powder substance from a spoon and walked into get his coffee. He was then taken outside and they searched his car and found 3 grams of cocaine. He was released with a citation. Word of advice: Don't do coke right next to a cop car.
Ravey's Music and Entertainment Report:> Cold Play was nominated for 7 Grammy awards
> Lil Wayne has 8 nominations
> Radiohead had 5 nominations
> The Final count of records sold of Chinese Democracy was 261,000
> Scott Weiland's solo record sold 10,500 copies. Sucker.
> Dr. Pepper is disapointed with Guns N Roses lawyers for turning a fun give away into legal dispute.
> Showtime announced that Californication is coming back.
> The New Ugly Betty is being bumped for Raiders Football. Menace was PISSED.
> They will be airing the new Grey's Anatomy.
Wheel of Stupid:> Police arrested a man in Conneticut who lit a small charcoal grill inside his appartment.
> There was a fire in Brooklyn that killed a FDYN officer. A young boy was burning wrapping paper on the stove that the family was using for warmth and decided to hide it under the bed. Next thing they knew the whole house burned down.
> Arrested a 52 year old man for driving with a revoked license. The man had stopped and started using his cell phone as a cop drove by. The man said, "please don't arrest me." After this the cop tried to arrest him and the man put up a little bit of a struggle. Once in the back of the cop car the guy argued with the cop that he didn't resist arrest because he, "would have known if he was resisting, because he knows karate and has been working out."
> A blow torch is not a good replacement for a broom. A man burned part of his house because he used a blow torch to get rid of spider webs
> An inmate who has twice escaped filed a lawsuit last week because the guards abused him and didn't do enough to stop him from escaping from jail.
Dumbass Contest: Who's Your Daddy?
#1. Miguel in Newark - 0 for 2 No Win!
#2. Patrick in San Mateo - 0 for 2 No Win!
#3. David in San Mateo - 1 outta 3 No Win!
#4. Mary in Milpitas - 0 for 2 No Win!
#5. Gloria in San Lorenzo - Got Dropped. No Win!
#6. Chris in Concord - 1 of 2 Got Dropped. No Win!
#7. Steven in Jose - 2 for 2!! Winner! God Dammit Finally.
Sexy Time Fun Facts:
> A 9 year old wrote a book on how to get girls. He was actually pretty smart.
> Police in Ohio say that they shut down an auction ring where guys can by $10 raffle tickets for an auction for a night with a hooker.
> Oxygen has naughty novelty infomercials on at 2 am. They sell things like the Accomodator (a dildo for your face) and the Little Chubby Dong.
Pointless Listener Poll: What is your signature move to get laid?
Tony: Telling them a lot of what they want to hear
Ravey: Come on let's go to the hockey game
Menace: Being Honest and upfront
News Round 2:> 17 year old Micahel Halpin collapsed infront out of no where. He later died at the hospital. There is no word what caused his death.
> Gavin Newsom and some officials are trying to drum up business in the city. They want people to come take advantage of the great discounts and sales in SF. Newsom's latest purchase is his $51,000 hybrid which he didn't buy in the city. He ran into someone from CBS and on camera he asked Newsom, "Why didn't you buy your car in SF?" and to our surprise, Newsom didn't have a slick answer, "Well...uhh...I don't know....Thanks for the gotcha question...I really don't know."
Guess The State: This old guy was crying like a baby because his local library was closing. This old dude was litterally bawling. Watch it here!
#1. Monica in Gilroy - Florida No Win!
#2. Allie in Fremont - Pennsylvania Winner!
What We Learned:
Ravey: Want to get her something for Christmas? TIVO late night Oxygen channel.
Menace: Tony can make a sound like this (weird wheeeeezing noise)
Greg: Sex toys sold on the Oxygen network sound like characters from Hawaii 5-0 like chubby little dong and chin-do.
Tony: Dont need a DNA test to know dean will be good at sittin on his ass
Woody: Ravey is going to have her stocking stuffed by stuff from the Oxygen network.
Katie: Menace is tough when it comes to bitches and hoes but when you take away his Ugly Betty he cries like a little girl.
Tony's Just a Headline: "Father and Son arrested for Cock Fighting."
No comments:
Post a Comment