Have a Happy Turkey Day!

Today is the last day! I must admit I am rather excited!! Hella turkey, mashed potatoes, cranberries, pie, ohhhh myyy goddddd. Yum Yum Yum

Today's Intern: Mike

What Shall We Discuss?: Goooood Mornun!! Greg is super upset about the fact we don't have to be back until Monday. In a span of 10 days a guy found out that he won 2 cars in 2 different contests and a pair of tickets to see The Chiefs. Woody got in the grossest cab. The cab driver had patches of hair (which we all agreed if you have patches of hair, just shave it.) and he was dirty and had really bad B.O. I hate cabs, I don't think I have ever been in a not gross cab. Some people didn't even have to work this week. Why we even come in for 2 days...I don't know. Last Thursday a guy was waiting to be transfered to jail, he was being guarded by 3 guards when he took off. He ran quite a distance, hopped 2 garden fences, and got away. Thing is. The inmate had 1 leg. This guy kicks ass.

News with Greg:

> New Orleans has the highest crime rate in the US. Oakland is on there! BIG SHOCKER.

> There is a pole dancing studio in Salt Lake City that is moving to have pole dancing become an olympic sport. I guess it's gymnastic like.

> There is a doctor who is working on "queing psychology" which is a study to help you cut the issue with standing in line. You have to realize ocupied time seems shorter than unocupied time. Anxiety makes the wait seem longer. Unfair waits are longer than fair ones. The more valuable the service that you are waiting for the longer you'll wait.

Sports With Ravey:

> Packers got beat by the Saints

> A federal judge dismissed 5 of the charges against Barry Bonds

> Michael Vick is in Virginia today. He is expected to plea guilty to state charges.

> Future: NFL games in 3D. > Sharks play tomorrow against Chicago.

> Pirates have signed the first 2 players to ever be signed to baseball from India. They are from a reality TV show - The Million Dollar Arm.

Music and Entertainment Report:

> New Scott Weiland, Linkin Park, Paramore, and the White Zombie Box Set.

> Hancock is out on DVD today

> Meet Dave and Space Chimps were huge flops
> A ruling communist newspaper in China bashed the new Guns N' Roses CD

> Twilights success basically guarenteed a sequel

> Steven Segal will be featured in a Reality Show on A&E -"Law Man"

> The Shield will be finishing its 5 year series

Final Word: Comes from Prince, who claims he was misquoted: "So heres how it is, you have the Republicans and they want to live according to this (pointing to the Bible) but on the opposite end you have the Democrats who think you can do whatever you want."

Thanksgiving Fun Facts

> 82% of Americans say they will eat Turkey

> 30% of Americans will actually cook a Turkey

> Overall there will be 9 guests around the average Americans table.

Pointless Listener Poll: What is the worst part of Holiday family time?

Ravey: It makes her sad, the old age, the smallness of it, and the wondering if it is going to be the last time.

Menace: The constant complaining (this is from other families because Menace doesn't visit his family.)
Greg: The pressure to make it perfect.

Tony: His immediate family doesn't annoy him but the extended family competes and has separate dinners.

Woody: The 3000 mile trip to just get there.

Katie: My aunt is a slut and she hits on anyone whether it be a friend or a boyfriend at the time that I have there.

Dumbass Contest: Turkey Day True or False

#1. Johnathon in Tracy - 0 for 2 No win!!

#2. Eddie in SF - 0 for 2 No Win!!

#3. Joe in Livermore - 2 outta 3!! Winner!!!

News with Greg-ELS:

> Former employees of Mervyns are expected to be fired without back vacation pay but the executives will be payed for vacation WITH bonuses

> David Lista is a former teacher, he got arrested and has to register as a sex offender for putting a camera in the ceiling in the girls bathroom and a camera that points up by his desk so he could see up the girls skirts. When they went to his house they found traces of meth and child porn.

Guess The State: Police say they had no trouble tracking down a robbery suspect, because the victims had taken his picture while chatting with him at a bar a short time before the theft. The suspect, Andre Smith, struck up a conversation with a group of women at a bachelorette party at the Bensalem Township taproom early Sunday morning. The women were taking photos of each other when Smith jumped in front of the camera. Smith later was ejected from the bar for allegedly harassing customers. When two women in the group left the bar to go to a nearby convenience store, Smith robbed them of their purses

#1. Mike in San Lorenzo - Florida. No win.

#2. Chris in San Jose - Pennsylvania!! Winner!!

Highest Paying Dirty Jobs

8. Coroner $52,000

7. Oil Drill Worker $55,000

6. Garbage Man $67,000

5. Vet $73,000

4. Nurse $81,000

3. Pediatrist $118,000

2. Gastro Anterologist $239,000

1. Trauma Surgen $273,000

Porno Birthday: Brit Morgan has appeared in 185, "Flint Bones" and "Porn-o-chio" She is 45

What We Learned:

Ravey : Menace would rather sit and eat a bucket of Pop Eyes rather than travel 30 minutes to see his family.

Menace: Pat Ravey loves Metallica.

Greg: Passed. Free Food means Commercials

Tony: ... No comment

Woody: You're going to find the freshest milk and a long line of people waiting to drink it from the tap.

Katie: Prince gives an awesome show, which means he is the complete polar opposite of Tony.

Tony's Just A Headline: " woody didnt care"

Gobble Gobble Mother Effers.