Today's Intern: Lauren who rules!!!
Talk-a-lakin: There was some crazy partying at Ravey's last night. Ravey was hella excited about the game and she couldn't sleep, but then she turned on The Hills and went into a coma. Homeless Jose won't leave, he now has moved in, including leaving his duffel
bag on her porch. Homeless Jose was screaming at Ravey's cab driver telling him "You're not picking up anyone here!!!" He then continued to scream at Ravey who had grabbed her mase. What a Psycho. Chris the douche bag in appt 1 is now homeless Jose's personal bitch. For some reason the homeless douche is getting the same amount of protection that Ravey would get. Tivo made an announcement yesterday that stated soon you will be able to set your
computer to be a Tivo. You will be able to save your shows and burn them to DVD. Saweeet. This goes on sale October 15th. Go to http://www.tivo.com/ for more info. A Japanese company has developed a wearable airbag that pops out when they fall. $1685.00 .... hella worth it. Party at Ravey's for the game last night. Menace couldn't have been any less interested. They had the Wii which made Menace all happy inside, Woody kicked ass at the ski jump, and now Jen wants a wii. Greg was crunking it up hard core. Greg has been the super angry man lately. We then talked about the biggest divorce settlement. Rupert Murdoch's divorce settlement was $1.7 billion. holy ish!!
Important Sperm News!!:
> Anti depressants could harm male fertility
> Porn is good for your swimmers
There are bets going around about when Jen will get Knocked up.
Ravey says January
Greg says December
Menace says Febuary
Tony says April
Woody thought I was out sick with AIDS...Thanks Woody...Suck it.
News with Greg:
> House voted against the Bail out agreement.
> Prosecution in robery case against OJ Simpson rested its case yesterday. Michael McClinton said that Simspon asked him to bring guns along and to "look menacing" Simpson says he never saw a gun and he denied any wrong doing. hella shocking
> Last Sunday in Indiana, this guy is woken up by screams coming from his 17 year old daughter. So he jumps out of bed, runs to her room, where he finds 52 year old, convicted sex offender David Myers, holding a knife, some rope, and a bunch of condoms. Myers also was naked at the time. The dad then started beating the holy crap out of him and by the time the cops got there, Myers was dead. F Yeah!!!! Good job pops!! He is not going to face any charges because he was defending his family!! That rules even more.
Douche Bag of the Day: 18 year old Nicita Wise, hired 2 hitmen to kill his mom. Why?? Nicita
wanted to sell his mom's car and take her money out of her bank account to buy his girlfriend new boobs. When the 2 hitmen attacked the mother with baseball bats, she got away and went to the hospital. The 3 face charges of conspiracy to commit first degree murder and are being held on $50,000 bail. If convicted they could get life in prison. Good. Stupid Morons.
Dumbass Contest: (For Oasis Tickets): Today's Contest is "Who Said It??"
#1. Jeremiah in SF - 2 outta 3 WINNER!! Good Job Jeremiah!!
#2. E in Santa Clara - 0 outta 2 No Win
#3. Joe in Holister - 1 outta 3 No Win
#4. Sal in San Leandro - 1 outta 3 No Win.
#5. Homberto in San Jose - 0 outta 2 No Win.
#6. Pat in SF - 2 outta 2 WINNER!!! Good Job Pat!
Weird ways to die....unluckiest people evverrrrrr:
> A girl who was going to pop out of a cake, suffocated and died before she could do her performance.
> A hiker got a tortus dropped on his bald head because the eagle who was carrying the tortus thought that the guys head was a rock.
> A guy who was obsessed with his smell doused himself a couple times a day and had some on hand at all times. His body absorbed too much and killed him due to heart failure.
> A guy at Great America went to get his wife's hat that had fallen off and while doing so, got a kick to the head by a Top Gun Rider.
> There were some crazy death stories from callers: Some lady beat her kids and put them in the freezer, mixed chemicals in the toilet, porcelain hit the guy in the head and killed him, etc.
Pointless Poll: What Would be the Worst way to die?
Animal: 7.1 %
Buried: 27.1 %
Drowning: 12.9 %
Fire: 37.1 % #1 worst way to die.
Freezing: (didn't give the percentage) Tie for Last
Hanging: (didn't give the percentage) Tie for Last
Murdered: 4.3 %
Starving: (didn't give the percentage)
Music and Entertainment Report:
> Rage against the Machine's -Tom Morello will be releasing his solo album soon.
> Iron man out on DVD today
> Forgetting Sarah Marshal also out on DVD today
> Travis Barker was released from the burn center yesterday. Travis is in good condition, and is on his way to L.A. by bus and that he will never fly again.
> Guns and Roses new CD release on Nov 25 through Best Buy Only
> Paris Hilton's show Be My New BFF starts tonight.
Final Word: Dennis Quade is mad at his Wife Meg Ryan - Is mad that she is still re hashing the development of the relationship.
We have a Ring tone section at live105.com Download our "Live Life and Party"
Woody has the live life and party ring tone, Jen thinks he's an ego-maniac
Talked to Jen- tried to get some answers as to why she hates grade the show and why Woody's shoes are Angst. Jen is adorable.
News Round 2 With Mr. Gory:
> New crime fighting program in Oakland. The goal is to focus on intervention services
> The S. Dakota Supreme court is focusing on whether yelling profanities at police officers is
disorderly conduct or if it is an issue of free speech.
> News with Woody: A hug has landed an Iowa city guy in trouble. This guy thought a cop needed a hug. Tried to give the cop a hug, and was charged with assault.
> Landlord tried to find a way to get rid of a guy who was living in the apartment. The best idea he could come up with was putting dead cats and using their smell to drive out the tenants. Our main question: Where the hell did he get dead cats???? We searched Craigslist but had no luck.
Sports with Ravels:
> Al Davis met with the coaching staff of the Raiders about replacing the coach Kiffin.
> Steelers beat the Ravens 23-20
> Jets - Smith has been sewed for the hit on Anquan Boldin
> Sharks lost to Phoenix last night
Guess the State (for Cheech and Chong Tickets): Last Monday a 55 year old named Greg was arrested for using an underwater camera to take pictures of the girls underwater in the pool. 2 families who had police officers in them were at the pool and noticed him. When they confronted him he tried to hide the camera in his shorts.
#1. Leon in Oakland -Florida - NO WIN
#2. Carlos in San Jose - Pennsylvania - NO WIN
#3. Blake in San Jose - Wisconsin - FOR THE WIN!!!
Doug Benson will be in tomorrow...GET EXCITED! LOVE THAT GUY!! and a new format for Got Game with Steve Masters!
What We Learned:
Ravey: Learned that she is no longer afraid of freezing to death because it is peacful.
Menace: didn't learn anything.
Greg: OJ just has a horrible Memory
Tony: He has porno to thank for Dean
Woody: Ravey's fall back career is a Nun Slut
Sarah: Learned to not do a Mott.
Tony's Just a Headline: "Police detain horse over stolen car"
2 comments:
Get well soon Katie!
i was going to comment on your generally poor, menace-level spelling and grammar mistakes, blaming it mostly on your overworkedness and unsleeplyness, but today wasn't bad. perhaps bed rest will do that to you. anyway, keep up the good work and remember Alk3!
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