You Effing C Word

Today is going to be amazing. This morning RULED. Noah's bagels was open so I bought a bagel box for us to chow down on. I got free parking. I love today.

Today's Intern: Sarahhh

Blabbity Blahhh: Goooooooood Morning! There was a story about me in the paper. Woody read it...and yes ladies and gentlemen, I meant it when I said that it was a privlige to work with these dorks. They are waiting for my sex tape to get out. And NO I haven't sent nudie pictures. Nice try though. There was this guy Reverend Right and he yells ALL THE TIME. THEEE GATESSS OF HELLLLLLL. Ravey sounds like a hard core slut right now. Dizzy Balloon won the opening spot for NSSN. Hear their cover of "My Parachute Won't Open" Here. Everyone is STOKED for Itzhak Valansky and his performances on Thursday.

News with Greg Gory:

> A military jet crashed into a San Diego town killing three yesterday. The pilot ejected right before the plane crashed and landed in a tree.

> A little 3 year old was rescued with his 2 dogs from the forest yesterday. The child had run away because he wanted to go "hunting and fishing."

> San Jose has slipped from #3 to #4 ranked safest large city.

Sports With Raspy Ravey:

> Panthers won last night

> Warriors finally ended their 9 game losing streak

> Randy Johnson needs a place to pitch next season.

> Derrek Rose was in bed cutting his delicious apple, he then cut himself with the knife and needed 10 stitches.

> Vikings won and the media went into the locker room for some post game footage. As a result they got a nudie shot.

Music and Entertainment Report:

> Dark Knight is out today

> Horton Hears a Who is out today and our very own "Man Child" is very excited.

> A documentary is out today called Man on Wire

> Milk won the Stanley Cramer award

> NBC will announce today that J-Lenno will stay with the network

> Season finale of Manswers is on tonight

Final Word: Kid Rock, who isn't worried about PETA, "My biggest extravagence is fur coats, I have one of every animal in my closet."

Random School Stories:

> A teacher is facing charges for attempting to enliven a seventh-grade discussion of slavery by binding the hands and feet of two black girls, prompting outrage from one girl’s mother and a prominent civil rights group.

> Christopher Morango was fired for conduct that was unbecoming of an officer. He was a school security cop.

> A former football coach took money out of the school account to "use for football gear", he took all $10,000 in a strip club.

FYI:

> 2008 is going to be recorded as the longest year ever because they are adding an extra second to the atomic clock....(I think this should fall in the Who Friggin Cares segment)

> Vinnie, from X men, wants to be known. If you ever see him out on the street, don't tell him that you don't know who he is, he'll kick your ass.

> The guys who play Jack Sparrow in Disneyland are lucky and screwed at the same time. All the characters were fired, BUT the reason was, the ladies kept flashing their boobs at them.

Psychic Susie Stevens is Here!

Susie Stevens has spent the last 35 years channeling on all aspects of life: the past, present and future - and helping her clients "get in touch with their souls."

Susie, who believes she "has a unique gift from God," is serious about her chosen profession, and emphasizes integrity and honesty are paramount between a psychic and client

"An ethical psychic helps the client deliver the data, both positive and negative, needed to make decisions. Anything else is manipulation."

Susie trained with now deceased astrologer Robert Cole, who considered her "to be my most gifted friend." She was a volunteer in a Santa Cruz mental facility and with Suicide Prevention for 13 years. Susie works with the survivors of domestic violence, and educates on the battered wife syndrome-work which Susie says has brought her closer to her expertise.

One of Santa Cruz's most popular psychics, Susie still has some of the same clients that she began with 35 years ago. Her success, she believes, is because, "I am very devoted to getting people in touch with their optimum potential."

Do you want to check her out?! call her at 1 (831) 475.7290

News Round Number 2:

> Same sex marriage supporters are pushing everyone to "call in gay" tomorrow to stay home and keep their wallets shut.

> There is a sushi buffet that is now charging if you leave any food on your plate.

These guys are the most mature people I have ever known. They fight over boogers.

Dumbass Contest: Are They Taller Than Tony?

#1. TJ in Oakland who hasn't been mugged yet - 0 outta 2 No!

#2. April in Daly City - 0 outta 2 No Win!

#3. David in Fremont - 2 outta 3 Winner!

What We Learned:

Ravey: The producers of Double Dare could have stopped a starving country.

Menace: 92.7 will be dead air tomorrow.

Greg: LWill never have a dream ranch in montana but will own an orphanage

Tony: Cant wait for dean to play with Jamarcus Kareem Garcel Fife.

Woody: Dave, Ravey, and Greg will not be at work tomorrow.

Katie: With the exception of Ravey I work with a bunch of Man Children who fight over boogers.

Tony's Just a Headline: "Woman Hurls Shoe in C Word Arguement."

What the Buck?

It's Monday! Only 4 Days until NSSN!!! Who's Excited?! We're going to have a crazy week: NSSN and Itzhak Valansky! Will your parachute open? Because mine won't....

Today's Intern: Jessica

Blabber Blabber: Gooooooooood Morning! Greg actually isn't happy that it is Monday. This is the last Monday in 2008 that we will be working. Greg sent everyone a strange text about how he was washing his car and some neighbor drove by (one he only recognized, he didn't know her) and she says, "Hey Greg, have fun doing whatever it is you do AFTER you wash your car." Terri Hatcher used to be a 49er cheer leader in 1983. Menace doesn't think she's hot. He's crazy, I think she is SUPER hot. Menace dared to text Ravey during a football game. He upset the Queen. We have a huge week this week. It's going to be great. We had some bands cover "My Parachute Won't Open" and I can't wait to hear them. Itzhak Valansky's music video, "My Parachute Won't Open." now has 11,500 hits! Jesssssssssus H! Everyone Bread the word about this song. We're blowing this up! The band Dizzy Balloon covered - "My Parachute Won't Open." It's great! Oh man this song rules .

News with Greg:

> O.J. was sentanced to 33 years. He was taken to a medium security prison but he is separated from the rest of the jail. He will be eligible for parole after 9 years.

> In Wisconsin some dumbass 59 year old woman left her dog Jiffy outside in single digit weather over night. Luckily Jiffy was overweight and survived the night. Dumb bitch.

Sports with Ravey:

> Jets have lost 2 in a row. They lost to the 49ers last night.

> Giants were distracted yesterday

> Pierce finally met with the police yesterday regarding the Plaxeco case.

> Steelers won in the final 7 minutes of the game.

> Titans beat Cleveland

> Cardinals beat the Rams 34 - 10

> Baltimore beat the RedSkins

> Greg Mattix is going to make a noon announcement of his retirement.

> Manny Pacquiao destroyed Oscar De La Hoya

> Michael Vick is now bankrupt. Good....Stupid Dick.

Ravey's Music and Entertainment Report:

> 4 Christmases was at the top of the box office this weekend.

> Twilight Sequel?? It's on a fast track to be made and they are looking for a new director

> Coldplay has been sued by Joe Satriani for plagerism

> Angelina Jolie is the highest paid working actress

> Steve-o will compete on next seasons "Dancing with the Stars"

Final Word: Alex Rodrigues denies anything sexual between him and Madona "We're just friends. I've never been on a plane with her."

Menace is looking for a lady OnDemand.

Comcast On Demand Dating Videos

#1. Louis - Check out his Video

#2. Totally Goth - Check out this Bitches Video

#3. MColleen - Check it out.

#4. Playa59 - Holla at Cha Boi

#5. Martina - Username Ska...because that is in. This bitch is crazy.

#6. Psycho Bitch Amanda - Jesssus H, Her video here.

5 Biggest Lies that Men tell Women
#1. She's just a friend

#2. I'm ready to settle down

#3. It's not you it's me.

#4. It was a one-time thing

#5. I'd never lie to you.

Dumbass Contest - Will Menace Know It.

#1. Lori in Antioch - 2 outta 3!!

A. What is an Abbreviation? - When you shorten a word. YES!

B. How do you abbreviate pounds? - lbs YES. (Lori said no though.)

C. Name 3 of the 4 Beatles - Ringo Star, John Lennon, and Paul McCartney. YES!

Lori's phone went dead. Aw. WINNER! We messed with her.

#2. Eric in SF - No Win.

A. How many stripes are on the flag? - 18. No!!

B. The first 6 letters on a standard keyboard? - No!!

Nicki Brought us Cup Cakes!!!!! Yummmmmmm

Do you want some of these cupcakes from heaven? contact her at: Hey There, Cupcake!

OJ Simspon talk, he made an emotional statement. This guy is a douche bag.

Madden did an interview with Scott Weiland -- ZzZzZzZzZz Wake me up when it's over.

News Round 2:

> Sunny Van Bula died after spending 28 years in a coma.

I missed some of this, today is crazy.

Douche Bag of the Day: Two crack head thugs had just beaten up and robbed an elderly woman and they decided to hail a cop car. When the cop asked for their ID the idiot accidentially revealed the $149 that they had just stolen.

Guess The State: On sunday morning , Tim Havers and Carolyn were having sex and out of no where Tim accidentially shot carolyn in the chest. They had a gun on the bed and he tossed it aside so it wouldn't be in the way during sex, when he threw the gun, it went off and shot carolyn in the chest. He is now facing charges

#1. Fred in San Jose - Pennsylvania No!

#2. Ryan in Hayward - Florida No!

#3. Chris in SF - Ohio Yes!!

What We Learned:

Ravey: Woody is clearly not concered about Santa's Naughty or Nice list since he gave Lori a heart attack.

Menace: How it feels to have a drill put through your head after the Scott Weiland Video

Greg: Youc ant strust studies about TV because he is not happy

Tony: Compared to Scott Weiland Tony and Menace are word smiths

Woody: Menace can get a $100 gift card to Best Buy for turning in his super gangster water pistol.

Katie: Ding a ding ding is clearly different from ding ding ding a ding.

Tony's Just a Headline: " Mutant Four Claw Monster Lady Caught in Road Island"

The Acomodater

This morning is going to be fabulous! I have the cranberry delight infront of me. It is the cranberry, frosted cake from starbucks. PLUS I have my white mocha!! How much better can this get!!!???

Today's Intern: Andrea

Hahahahahahaha (That's what you all will be saying): Gooooooood Morning! This week was magic. We came back from break and had: Gory's Munch Nut Tale, We had Woody's Baby News, and The Internet Phenominom Itzhak Valansky (which by the way his video is up to 7,442 views).

Comment's on My Parachute Won't Open Video:

Tapatiobravo (5 hours ago)
Ok Wtf? You guys said hes crap for internet knowledge yet hes able to post a video on youtube?... Oh sorry not internet capable, he just doesnt know how to check his email. Im calling shananagans.

spartandx (9 hours ago)
Pink Floyd On Steroids Love It!

ScrotumPoleCat (16 hours ago)
Lesson learned, never let your biatch pack your chute.Do it yourself or die.

Valansky has a pretty amazing story. His siblings were killed in the Halocaust but his parents survived. He has an 80 year old book store which is being closed because he is 6 months behind on his rent! This guy is an amazing story. We're going to blow his life up and make him famous, here we go, Woody Show Style!

Anyone who is dissing our buddy Itzhak can SUCK IT. Take that.

News with President Greg:

> Republican Rosletnen hung up twice on Barak Obama because she thought that they were prank phone calls. She told him, "Boy you are a better impersonator than that guy on SNL" He was calling to congradulate her on her re-election.

> At&t announced that they are going to cut 12,000 jobs

> In Pensylvania - A woman is a sports bar because she sat down on the toilet, the seat broke, and she was stuck in the toilet bowl.

Queenie has our Sports:

> The end of the season can't come fast enough for the Raiders

> The Niners welcome the Jets

> Dallas at Pittsburg is going to be huge. It's going to be 20 degrees and snowing full on.

> Avery apologized for his "sloppy seconds" comment. He is facing "anger management" and indefinite suspension (6 games). This is so dumb.

> The Sharks are kicking ass. End of story.

> Warriors are playing the Rockets tonight at 5:30

Music and Entertainment Report:

> The 3rd Punisher hits theatres today

> There is a new game for the IPhone called "Christmas with Weezer"

> Trent Resner posted that the plans to make a 3D movie of a live concert fell through.

> A sewing machine signed by Metallica being auctioned off at the Wee Scotty Shop.

> Paris Hilton is trying to land the role of Tinker Bell in the upcoming movie. Haha Tinker Slut.

Final Word: Heather Lockleer, talks about her rough year "It's been a rough 2008, I hope for a good 2009. It's only a couple of weeks away, I'll just stay in my house."

Happy Happy Story Time: Out of Oregon, Scott had taken his 22 year old girlfriend to proposal rock. They had been dating since 2005, he arrived in Oregon 3 days before. The tide had receded around the rock. About 10 feet from the rock a 3 ft wave hit both of them. He turned into it to avoid from getting knocked over, but when he turned around his 4 ft. 11 in. girlfriend was gone. She got pulled in by the wave and she has dissapeared.

Gay News:

> 1 in 4 girls will kiss a girl.

> 6% of lesbians think that their sexuality is a result of an event in their life.

> We didn't talk about this on the show but I got a call about this and it's pretty entertaining. Prop 8 Musical

> A couple weeks ago a groupe of 140 retired military officers are fighting the don't ask don't tell policy

> The pregnant man is in the news again. Jeeesus. They are now annoyed with the cameras. If your annoyed, then dont be a man and get pregnant. Idiot

> A group of gay activists went "dog nuts" when they found out that there are 2 penguins in New York who are in a monogomas gay relationship. The gay penguins are hella cutty. They go in and steal the heterosexuals eggs and replace them with rocks. They are now fencing the gay penguins from the straignt penguins, which means that we now have gay segregation.

Dumbass Contest: The NSSN Alumni Challenge

#1. Brad in Richmond - 0 for 2 No Win.

#2. Robert in San Mateo - 0 for 2 No Win.

#3. Chris in San Jose - 2 for 2!!! Winner!

News Round 2:

> Facebook now has a virus. It is sending you messages that look like something that are normal.

> A fight broke out between 2 woman broke out at the mall this weekend. A woman thought that the cashier at a store called her a "C word" so the woman picks up a shoe and attempts to throw it at her head. Funny thing is, the lady threw the shoe and missed and hit another employee.

> There is a chance for inmates to be released earlier than planned. That's right. For one small cost. They have to play janitor. That means cleaning up poop, vomit, saliva, urine, and other nasty nasty things.

Aries Spears is Here!!!!!: He said that because Barak won now black people have to be on time and get a job. 510 texts that they saw Airies with some blonde chick in a club in Sac. Airies is into legs, calves, ass, boobs, lips, face etc.

Men Myth Busters:

4 Things Guys Suposedly Look For:

1. How she treats other people - No.

2. Her hair - Maybe.

3. The little things that she points out and her take on the world - No.

4. Her hands - Yes.

Aries Will Be at Cobb's

Friday, December 5 - 8:00 pm and 10:15 pm

Saturday, December 6 - 8:00 pm and 10:15 pm

Sunday, December 7 - 7:00 pm

Also check him out HERE

Jan Wahl is here:

Jan would vote for any song that she could dance to, which means we should stop the Friday Song Challenge today to prevent that. Anyways....

> Christmas Story is celebrating its 25th anaversary

> Movie theatre attendence is up! People are spendng their time at the movies now, more than anything.

> Grand Torino gets 4 hats and it's a great movie. And no Menace, it's not a video game. Moron.

Friday Song Challenge with a Twist: We announced these at the beginning of the show so you guys could vote all morning!

Tony- Nothin But a Good time - Poison 19.2%

Woody - Cherry Pie - Warrent 33.7% Winner!!!!

Ravey - Panama - Van Halen 17.2%

Greg Gory - Dr. FeelGood - Motley Crew 25.1%

Menace - Shake Me - Cinderella 4.9%

THIS WEEKS HIGHLIGHTS! CHECK OUR PODCAST SECTION AT LIVE105.COM

My Parachute Won't Opppeennnnn

This morning was weird. All of Castro Valley, the ENTIRE town, was pitch black. Zero power. Kinda creepy. Then I'm driving to pick Menace up and some guy was getting his ass KICKED. Intense Morning.

Today's Intern: Mike


10,000 feet highhhhh: Goooooooood Morning! Belmont wants to ban the sales of hard alcohol. F you Belmont!!!! That is very San Francisco of them. Gavin Newsom is hella jealous, "I wanna ban something!" Menace hates water, because it doesn't taste like anything. Itzhak Valansky is a new star thanks to the show. As of yesterday, his music video had 210 views. As of 6:03 am there were 4,654 views. Hells Yes! Some people were dead to real.



Comments on "My Parachute Won't Open"
#1. zubin27 (7 hours ago)
you guys are obviously a bunch of mooks. The philosophical issues itzhak brings up in this song are beyond what you're plebeian minds can grasp. The song is about love, and how that person can fuck you over, hard. In this case, his parachute won't open and "you were the one who packed my bags." He then goes on to say "breaking up is hard to do, and actions speak louder than words." She was being creative....this song is the new millenia's version of "im only sleeping" by the beatles. kudos
#2. rxbanditboy1112 (10 hours ago) So from 10,000 feet to 8,000 feet he traveled 75.75 miles per hour, then from 8,000 to 4,000 he is traveling 48.701 mph, then from 4000 to 3000 it is 333.333333 mph (same with 3000 to 2000). Then all of a sudden from 2000 to 1000 he slows down to 167.6667 and then from 1000 to 0 it ends at 142.857 mph. Terminal velocity is 120mph. So despite the laws of fix this song is awesome or something.

Yesterday we learned that the general tickets are sold out for NSSN 2008. They then released some limited view tickets. We will also be giving away some tickets next week. So the doctors can't figure out how to cure herpes, cancer, or even the common cold, BUT they can go into your DNA and tell you what sports you can play.


News with Mr. Greg:
> The state appeals court over ruled Arnold Schwarzenegger about the parole of a man who bruttally killed his wife with a sledgehammer back in 1986. He was recovering from alcoholism and she was parading him for being sexually inadequate.
> A 19 year old girl was arrested, cuffed, and put her in the back of a cop car. She managed to get the cuffs around her body and she STOLE the cop car. What a kickass chick.
> On day 2 of hunting season, a guy shot a deer, thought it was dead, but to his surprise the deer jumped up and attacked the hunter with its antlers. HELLS YES GO DEER!!


Ravey has some Sports for us:
> Plaxeco Burress is done for the year. The attention has been put off to Pierce (the linebacker) who called the trainer right after Plaxeco shot himseslf. He hasn't faced any charges just yet.
> Kevin and Pat Willams have recieved a restraining order on their suspention. There is a chance that they will play this weekend.
> The doctor who treated Burress is also suspended for not reporting the shooting.
> Blue Jackets are up agains the Sharks at the Tank tonight.

Stupid Human Story: This on is from Arkansas: Police said they arrested a man who needed an extra boost with his coffee. This man pulled up next to an unmarked cop car. He then snorted a white powder substance from a spoon and walked into get his coffee. He was then taken outside and they searched his car and found 3 grams of cocaine. He was released with a citation. Word of advice: Don't do coke right next to a cop car.



Ravey's Music and Entertainment Report:
> Cold Play was nominated for 7 Grammy awards
> Lil Wayne has 8 nominations
> Radiohead had 5 nominations
> The Final count of records sold of Chinese Democracy was 261,000
> Scott Weiland's solo record sold 10,500 copies. Sucker.
> Dr. Pepper is disapointed with Guns N Roses lawyers for turning a fun give away into legal dispute.
> Showtime announced that Californication is coming back.
> The New Ugly Betty is being bumped for Raiders Football. Menace was PISSED.
> They will be airing the new Grey's Anatomy.


Wheel of Stupid:
> Police arrested a man in Conneticut who lit a small charcoal grill inside his appartment.
> There was a fire in Brooklyn that killed a FDYN officer. A young boy was burning wrapping paper on the stove that the family was using for warmth and decided to hide it under the bed. Next thing they knew the whole house burned down.
> Arrested a 52 year old man for driving with a revoked license. The man had stopped and started using his cell phone as a cop drove by. The man said, "please don't arrest me." After this the cop tried to arrest him and the man put up a little bit of a struggle. Once in the back of the cop car the guy argued with the cop that he didn't resist arrest because he, "would have known if he was resisting, because he knows karate and has been working out."
> A blow torch is not a good replacement for a broom. A man burned part of his house because he used a blow torch to get rid of spider webs
> An inmate who has twice escaped filed a lawsuit last week because the guards abused him and didn't do enough to stop him from escaping from jail.


Dumbass Contest: Who's Your Daddy?
#1. Miguel in Newark - 0 for 2 No Win!
#2. Patrick in San Mateo - 0 for 2 No Win!
#3. David in San Mateo - 1 outta 3 No Win!
#4. Mary in Milpitas - 0 for 2 No Win!
#5. Gloria in San Lorenzo - Got Dropped. No Win!
#6. Chris in Concord - 1 of 2 Got Dropped. No Win!
#7. Steven in Jose - 2 for 2!! Winner! God Dammit Finally.


Sexy Time Fun Facts:
> A 9 year old wrote a book on how to get girls. He was actually pretty smart.
> Police in Ohio say that they shut down an auction ring where guys can by $10 raffle tickets for an auction for a night with a hooker.
> Oxygen has naughty novelty infomercials on at 2 am. They sell things like the Accomodator (a dildo for your face) and the Little Chubby Dong.


Pointless Listener Poll: What is your signature move to get laid?
Tony: Telling them a lot of what they want to hear
Ravey: Come on let's go to the hockey game
Menace: Being Honest and upfront

News Round 2:
> 17 year old Micahel Halpin collapsed infront out of no where. He later died at the hospital. There is no word what caused his death.
> Gavin Newsom and some officials are trying to drum up business in the city. They want people to come take advantage of the great discounts and sales in SF. Newsom's latest purchase is his $51,000 hybrid which he didn't buy in the city. He ran into someone from CBS and on camera he asked Newsom, "Why didn't you buy your car in SF?" and to our surprise, Newsom didn't have a slick answer, "Well...uhh...I don't know....Thanks for the gotcha question...I really don't know."



Guess The State: This old guy was crying like a baby because his local library was closing. This old dude was litterally bawling. Watch it here!
#1. Monica in Gilroy - Florida No Win!
#2. Allie in Fremont - Pennsylvania Winner!

What We Learned:
Ravey: Want to get her something for Christmas? TIVO late night Oxygen channel.
Menace: Tony can make a sound like this (weird wheeeeezing noise)
Greg: Sex toys sold on the Oxygen network sound like characters from Hawaii 5-0 like chubby little dong and chin-do.
Tony: Dont need a DNA test to know dean will be good at sittin on his ass
Woody: Ravey is going to have her stocking stuffed by stuff from the Oxygen network.
Katie: Menace is tough when it comes to bitches and hoes but when you take away his Ugly Betty he cries like a little girl.

Tony's Just a Headline: "Father and Son arrested for Cock Fighting."

WTF?

Hola peoples. Today is going to be fantastic, I can feel it! Other than the fact that I can't stop coughing due to my huge pine alergy. Cough Cough Sniffle Sniffle.... Tony is acting the happiest I've seen him. He is still on his rush from the ACDC concert last night. Hilarity.

Today's Intern: Jessica

Talk-a-lakin: Goooood Morning!! Tony is so excited about the ACDC, "I felt like a 12 year old girl at a New Kids On The Block concert." Tony spent $100 on: A T-shirt, a sweatshirt, and 2 beers. (2 beers = $24) Tony "spoiled" the concert according to someone in the 925. God Tony, how inconsiderate of you. Cold Remedies: Orange juice or vitamin C (prevenative) and tea for a sore throat. Greg and Menace call shenanigans. Woody drinks soda, soda, soda and Ravey went mommy on him but was right as she was doing so. In Wisconsin a radio station had to make an offer to get 2 people to stop competing in a contest for a new car. This couple had been living in their truck for 55 days. They thought that the couple would never stop so they made an offer that if they stopped now the runner up would get $10,000 plus other prizes. Woody is letting everyone know that we will never do anything like this, because they are trying to drive us away. We're those people in the restaurant that the waitresses stop checking on in hopes that they will just leave. We are the leafy, zipper like stretch marks of this station.

News With Greg Gory:
> Measure B is still being covered. This would extend BART to San Jose (which would rule) with several stops in between. There was a law suit because there was a requested re-count but it wasn't requested early enough.
> The Hollywood Casino was going to send 1,000 people $100 credits for slot machines. Instead of it being sent to 1,000 it was sent to 55,000 people. The casino says that due to this mistake, if all 55,000 take up that offer, the Casino will be out $29 million.
> AIG changed the english language. Instead of calling the given money at the end of the year a "Bonus" they are calling it a "Retention Pay". People are recieving this "retention pay" for keeping their jobs.

Sports With Ravey:
> Plaxeco Buress is done. The Giants are finished with him. He will be suspended.
> The NFL announced that 6 players will be suspended for using steriods. Kevin and Pat Williams for the Vikings are included in these 6
> Sean Avery said some stupid comment, "sloppy seconds" about his ex girlfriends during an interview. Within minutes he was suspended indefinitely for making comments that don't have anything to do with the game.
> The Sharks were great last night. They won 5-2
> Michael Phelps was named "Sportsman of the year" by Sports Illustrated.

Menace has a theory that if enough people say that someone famous is hot, then automatically people will think that person is attractive. I think this is true, I don't go with this trend but I agree with Menace

Douche Bag of The Day: Nikki Riley, a guy who went into a restaurant bathroom and strapped 3 nail bombs to himself with a note saying that he was going to do a suicide bombing. He got stuck inside the toilet stall, and the bombs went off in his hands, AND he was the only one injured. He now faces charges of attempted murder.

Music and Entertainment Report:
> Kid Rock is blogging about his dissapointment in Georgia Judge
> Billy Joe talked about Green Day's new album. It is going to be great
> 30 Seconds to Mars is recording their 3rd album
> Cold Play and Leonna Lewis were the 2 top downloaded artists from Itunes in 2008
Final Word: Ozzy Ozbourne who is 60 today, "When I was 20 I would say I was going to die when I was 40. I got nervous when I was 39 and a half"

We played in the Ayer! Woody, Menace, and I were the only ones who were hardcore rockin out to that song. Oh Hot Jam, This is My Jam.

This then turned into a sex/std session. I don't really know how this happened.

Worst Band Submissions from NSSN 2008: We're letting the listeners vote on the finalists of the worst of the worst. First the show will rate from a 1 to 5, 5 being good and 1 being the worst. Then we'll have the listeners text in about our top 3.
#1. Donald Prolo - Waterfalls
Ravey says 1
Woody says 2
Menace says 2
Greg says 2
Tony says 2
#2. Sleepless Mind - It's up to you
Ravey says 3
Menace says 4
Greg says 4
Tony says 5
Woody says 4
#3. Playground Kings - Bea-uty Ravey says 1
Menace says 3
Greg says 3
Tony says 1
Woody says 3
#4. The Number Fox - Pirates -e- Ninjas
Ravey says 4
Menace says 1
Greg says 1
Tony says 4
Woody says 3
#5 Itzhak Valansky - My Parachute Won't Open
Ravey says 2
Menace says 2
Greg says 0
Tony says 1
Woody says 1

We narrowed it down to 3
A. Itzhak Valansky - My Parachute Won't Open - 54.8% Winner!...or loser....No idea.
B. Donald Prolo - Waterfalls - 32.9%
C. Playground Kings - Bea-uty - 12.4%

Our Very own Itzhak Valansky has a MUSIC VIDEO!! check it out My parachute won't open!
He will be in studio December 11 (the day of NSSN) and he will be our guest at NSSN that night!!


Who Knew?:
> 1 in 10 nurses smoke
> Woman who smoke have a 14.7 year shortage on their life
> Listening to happy music can help your heart.
> Divorced people have a life span that is 9 years shorter.
> 3,812 deaths in 2006 due to air pollution.

Got Game With Masters:
> Call of Duty World at War is ruling! You must play this game. 4.5 Blow up Girlfriends

Dumbass Contest: Where Did I go Last Night?
#1. Lorie in Antioch - Car Shopping No Win!
#2. Alan in San Jose - Bar No Win!
#3. Steven in SF - ACDC Concert! Winner!!

What We Learned:
Ravey: Nothing brings joy like a parachute that wont open
Menace: Will spend all day twittering my parachute wont open
Greg: Santa does exsist and his name is Aaron Axelson
Tony: Beth and Tony are both swingers
Woody: Riding a hog is bad for your hog.
Katie: The Station is driving us away because we are the zipper like stretch marks of LIVE 105

Tony's Just a Headline: "Man With Lightsaber Ends Up in the E.R."

4:15 AM: So What Are You Up To This Morning?

Good Morning Everybody...I'm at a loss for words, so...uhh.....yeah. Let's just start the show.

Today's Intern: Sarah from Half Moon Bizzz-ay.

Burrrrp: Gooooooooooooooooooooooood Mornun! Menace needs a car. Woody is tired of hearing him bitch about it. If Menace were to ask every one of his myspace friends for a dollar, we could make this work. Biggest story of the year? Obama? Economy? Gas Prices? Nope...

Yahoo Top 10 Most Searched Things in 2008:

#10 American Idol

#9 Angelina Jolie

#8. Lindsay Lohan

#7. Japanese Cartoon Naruto

#6 Jessica Alba

#5. Online Game RuneScape

#4 Miley Cirus

#3. Barak Obama

#2. World Wrestling Entertainment

#1. Brittney Spears

Ask.com's Top 10 Asked Questions:

#10. How do I download videos

#9. Why is the sky blue?

#8. How do I register to vote?

#7. What is the meaning of life?

#6. How do I change my name?

#5. How much is my car worth

#4. How much is minimum wage?

#3. How do I write a resume?

#2. How do I lose weight?

#1. How do I get pregnant?

This then led to internet talk, which led to Menace flipping out. The Woody Show page is weak, no one knows wtf Menace does in his office. Either his head is down or he's blasting techno whilst twittering. Greg seems to be the only one who thinks that it is good and has a lot on it. Oh well. Menace's quote to Dave, "(lots of yelling)....So WHAT?! HOLLA AT CHA BOI!"

Just for Ravey: A man who works as "Trim Trim" the party clown. Trim Trim made his living by showing up at children's birthday parties and playing with the kids. He has now been sentenced to jail for 12 years for continual sexual abuse of 2 teenage girls ages 12 and 14.

The guy who does our live105 commercials sounds like a child diddler.

News with Greg:

> President Bush talked about his Presidency last night. He talked about a bunch of things including the economic crisis. "I will leave the Presidency with my head held high."

> A study was released saying that we are due for a terrorist attack by 2013.

> The CA ocean protection counsel says that people should have to pay a fee at any market when they use plastic or paper bags. The purpose is to encourage people to bring their own bags.

Sports with Ravey:

> The NFL can and will probably suspend Plaxico Burress for carring a weapon. This is the guy who shot himself...just fyi. Plaxico Burress went to the hospital after shooting himself, he claimed his name was Harris Smith and that he'd been shot at applebees.

> The Warriors shot themselves in the foot. The heat was down 3 and as the Warriors went to throw the ball in, they accidentially threw it to the other team.
> Toronto beat LA last night

Ravey's Music and Entertainment Report:

> The new Britney Spears CD is out today

> Akon's new CD is out today

> Step Brothers is out today

> Disney is giving away free Bart rides from 7-9am

> The new Guns N' Roses isn't doing so hot.
> Creed is officially working on a 2009 tour

> Tina Fey is talking about the scar on her left cheek - She was attacked as a child and she gave details

> According to Jim is still on ABC - This is huge news to us. It is back with new episodes tonight!

Final Word: Blake Civil Fielder, Amy Winehouse's husband who just got out of jail and is going to rehab, "I made the biggest mistake of my life when I did heroin in front of her. I introduced drugs and self harm to her. I feel I ruined something beautiful."

That's Just Not Right:

> A guy, Harvey, called a radio station because he was having trouble finding a date. The radio station called an unnamed girl and set them up on a date at the House of Blues. The night of the date, Harvey called the girl and said he was too tired to go to dinner and offered to cook her dinner at his house. The thing that the radio station and the girl didn't was that Harvey is a registered sex offender. The girl went to his house, he drugged her, and sexually fondled her.

> 6 teenage girls were charged with mis treating elderly residents in the elderly home they worked in. The girls touched and spanked the residents, inserted a finger into an anus, dry humping a resident, putting their bare backsides in resident's faces, poking residents breasts and genitals, and rubbing an elders genitals until it became errect.

> A woman who went to the hospital because of what she thought was a kidney stone with severe abominal pain. The doctors didn't do any blood test or anything and they sent her home. By the time her fiance brought her back the next day, the infection had spread to all of her limbs and both of her harms and legs had to be amputated.

> A cambodian father inserted a hose you use to fill up tires into his 5 year old's anus and attempted to blow him up. The father said, "he was just playing with his son"

> A man in Nebraska faces assult charges for attacking his girlfriend for making him macaroni for dinner.

> In Canada are investigating a 14 year old boy who made a facebook group that celebrates "kick a ginger day" the boy is "sorry."

Dumbass Contest: What's The Charge?

#1. Stephan in SF - 0 for 2 No Win!

#2. Ivan in San Jose - 0 for 2 No Win!

#3. Abby in SF - 1 out of 3 No Win!

#4. Stewie in Oakland - 0 for 2 No Win!

#5. Carl in Castro Valley - 2 out of 3 Winner!

Pointless Listener Poll: Email from Kelly in Santa Rosa: Wants to know what is missed the most about being a child. Thanks Kelly! Suck it!

Ravey: Spending time and hanging out with the grandparents.

Menace: After school, being able to have a group of friends to go skate.

Greg: Being able to be interested in a 30 minute cartoon.

Tony: Nothing he still is a kid.

Woody: The schedule.

Katie: I miss the bonus after the doctor and dentist appts. Now the whole thing sucks, nothing like lollipops and toys to look forward to.

News Round 2 With Greg:

> Chicago police have formally arrested William Balfour, the estranged brother in law of Jennifer Hudson, in connection with the deaths of Hudson's mother, brother, and young nephew. Balfour was taken into custody by detectives yesterday from Stateville Correctional Center in Illinois, where he was being held on a suspected parole violation. He had previously only been considered a "person of interest" in the case. Last month, he refused to take a polygraph test and refused to cooperate with detectives on the case. Police confirmed that they have the weapon used in the murders.

> San Francisco's tenderloin has always been a rough neighborhood. Well it's getting quite a bit of attention due to a web cam that was set up by Adam Jackson. So far, the web cam has captured street fights, break ins, and a high speed chase. This camera has only been up for 5 and 1/2 weeks.

> In San Antonio, a man who rammed his truck into a woman's car on Friday morning at 100mph says that God told her to do it.

Athlete Dumbass Injuries:
> Bill Gramatica fell and tore his ACL while celebrating
> A soccer player hurt himself while doing a back flip
> Chris Hanson missed the wood and hit himself in the leg with an axe
> Glenn Alan Hill had a dream about spiders, started sleep walking, and fell down the stairs
> John Smalts ironed his shirt, while he was still wearing it.

Guess the State: Two men accused of outfitting a 1992 Lincoln with red and blue lights and performing fake traffic stops, video taped this and put it on youtube. They are being held on a $5000 bond.

#1. Stephen in SF - Florida

#2. Justin in SF - Ohio

#3. Dari in Daily City - Wisconsin! Winner!

What We Learned:

Ravey: If Plaxeco had worn something classier than sweats to the club he might not be in so much trouble

Menace: Getting shot at Applebees isn't as gangster as showing your nard to a doctor.

Greg: If you get a vasectomy you not only get your junk cut but you get to smell the burning

Tony: Ravey thinks its funny to put down fat chicks

Woody: Now knows what nursing home he wants his kids to put him in.

Katie: Woody took the show for a turn and took us all down pus lane.

Tony's Just a Headline: "County Officials Talking Trash"

And We're Backkkk!!!

It was such a nice break, but I must admit, I am glad to be back at work. I start to run out of ideas on what to do with myself. How much turkey did you guys eat? Because I'm pretty sure that after I was done there was none left in the world. Yum Yum Yum in my Tum Tum Tum!

Today's Intern: Jessica

Blabber: Gooooooooooooooooooooood Mornun!! We're glad to be back. Ravey got to see some snow, it was the winter wonderland! Woody said that coming back to this weather is like pooping backwards. It is December 1st. This year flew! The worlds oldest person, who was some lady who was 115, died. Earlier this year Kat Von D set a world record of 400 tattoos in an 24 hours, this pissed off some tattoo artist named John Joe McAnus who then did 750 tattoos in 24 hours, and then some other guy did 802 tattoos in 24 hours. I would love to be the last person to get the tattoo this day. The fat guy Manuel from Monteray lost 550 lbs. He got married, but because he was so fat, the couple couldn't have sex. To solve his problem, he had his friends help build him a RAMP to move his gut so his wife could get to his man junk. That is the hottest thing I have ever heard. There is a blanket out there with sleeves?!? I need to get on that.

News with Greg:

> Obama is going to announce 6 appointments today including Clinton as Secretary of State. Bill Clinton had to agree to a bunch of conditions in order for Hillary to become Sec. of State.

> Newsom is going to give his City Address

(which is 7.5 hours long) on his Youtube channel. It will be spit into 10 channels which 45 minute clips. Check out this HELLA EXCITING VIDEO at www.youtube.com/mayorgavinnewsom

> This Chicago couple has taken the whole "don't have sex until your married" thing WAYY far. This past weekend they had their first kiss....at the altar. Their kiss lasted 2 minutes...how awkward would that be to be sitting it the pews for the wedding while these people kiss for 2 minutes.

Ravey has our Sports:

> Giants receiver Plaxico Burress accidentally shot himself in the right thigh while at a Manhattan nightclub early Saturday. He claimed he was carrying a gun because he was wearing a lot of "bling" and carrying a huge wad of cash. The gun slipped down his leg and he accidentially pulled the trigger some how. (just fyi, Ravey read this story with the back ground music of In Da Club - 50 Cent.... haha)

> 49ers defense acutally showed up this weekend.

> Raiders kept sucking and lost to the Chiefs.

> Giants are still the best team in football.

> Chargers just suck and they lost to Atlanta

> Vikings crushed the Bears

Who Friggin Cares:

> Kelly Osbourne is engaged. How do we know?! Her 18 year old boyfriend changed his profile status to "Engaged to Kelly Osbourne"

Music and Entertainment Report:

> Twilight lost 62% of its business this weekend

> Bolt held strong this weekend

> Kristen Stewart was caught on camera smoking a bowl in front of her house.

> Dr. Pepper is causing huge problems and is facing law suits because of their promise of free soda. Guns N Roses is pissed because the whole let down tainted their Album relief

> Rosie O'Donnell's variety show was a crap shoot.

> November sweeps is over, so they will be serving us repeats tonight

Final Word: Reese Witherspoon, she limits her present giving on Christmas, "I'm a little strict about that stuff, and I think that kids do best when they only have a couple things that they really enjoy."

Greg has a Great Thanksgiving Story For Us: Greg went to a friends house for a post Thanksgiving Fiesta. He walks goes to the door, knocks, walks in the house, and the friends dog...LUNGES at him and bites him in the crotch. He first noticed that this dog bit through his jeans and his underwear is soaked in blood. He pulls his pants down and notices that there were 2 puncture wounds in his right testicle. He is going to let us know if he is going to lose a nut, maybe we'll auction it off.

Woody's Big Holiday News: Mr. Woody is going to be a Daddy!!! :-) The baby is due in June. Menace's only point....another California Native

Dumbass Contest: Tony-oke!!

#1. Joey in Hayward - The Theme to Bonanza No Win!

#2. Ryan in Fremont - Take me out - Franz Ferdinand Winner!

Ways to Go Green:

#1. Use cloth diapers, and re-use them over and over.

#2. Limit the size of your family...this one made no sense

#3. The more bike lanes, the more bike riders.

Some guy named Nick is spraypainting dead, brown grass...green. That's right. Is your grass dead? Call Nick, he'll coat your grass with paint for a reasonable price.

7 Most Retarded Things that Celebs are doing to "Go Green" (http://www.crap.com/)

#1. Al Gore - His concerts. He flew these famous people around the world in Jets

#2. Harrison Ford - Waxes his chest to save the rainforest.

#3. Cold Play - Planting trees that aren't helping or are dead.

#4. Woody Hearlson - Vegan Clothes flown over by Jet...idiot

#5. Sheryl Crowe - 1 sheet of TP per visit

#6. Jennifer Aniston - Brushes her teeth in the shower

#7. Paul McCartney- Got a Lexus hybrid, which was flown to him via private jet.

News Round 2 with Greg:

> Shoppers were out in full force on Friday. Police are investigating the trampled employee at Walmart. The employee was 32 years old and got trampled by 2000 people. Another person injured was a pregnant woman.

> Toy makers are getting flooded with letters from parents who are expressing concern about adds directed at children.

> The owners of a family Ball Berring company, just thanked their workers by giving out surprise bonuses. They gave out $6 million. The minimum was $10,000. They gave up to $35,000.

Guess the HOME state: A stand off at a bank is over after a person seen inside was actually a full sized cardboard figure. The police got a sounded alarm from the bank, when they showed up, they saw what they thought was a person through the blinds. They then sent for the SWAT team. When they went in they found that it was a cardboard cut out.

Justin in Union City said its New Jersey....he is....CORRECT!

What We Learned:

Ravey: The Australian Sheppard thinks that testicles are as tasty as snosages

Menace: Ravey and Menace's Mario Cart fun has come to an end due to Woody being a daddy.

Greg: Hella jobs will be opening up because Woody will do nothing as a parent. He will need a stroller pusher, tear wiper, diaper changer, etc.

Tony: Menace is the only fat Bullemic and Greg had one nutty adventure!

Woody: The chance of getting shot at a Toy's R Us and at a Night Club are equal

Katie: Nothing makes Ravey hotter than a Gut Ramp.

Tony's Just a Headline: "Holiday Fun can Mean Constipation for Kids."